CraigHThe benefits of working together as a famly
November 14th 2006 08:47
When I was a child growing up in New Zealand I read an intriguing story about a while farmer who moved into a predominantly Maori community. At hay making time he was surprised when his neighbors turned up uninvited to help him get his hay in before the approaching rains arrived and ruined the crop. He offered to pay them for their efforts and they were offended by this gesture. They explained that it was the obvious thing to do and that they would expect him to do the same for them in similar circumstances.
This story stuck in my mind ever since. My father built his first house with his own hands and with the help of a carpenter friend. They spend every evening and every weekend for two years building the house (as well as raising a family, working full time and attending technical college in the evenings) and the did the same for another two years while they built the friend's house. There was no thought of asking each other for payment, simply an unspoken agreement that they would help each other as and when needed and that two people working together are more efficient than two working apart.
Throughout my childhood I bonded with my family through work. We build retaining walls, stripped wall paper, painted boats, chopped wood, stripped paint and renovated our batch (Kiwi slang for "holiday house"). On one memorable weekend I laid concrete all day Saturday, went to a school formal that night, stayed up all night partying, went sailing all day Sunday only to return home exhausted at 10pm Sunday evening to be greeted by my father with the news that I was just in time to help him put a coat of paint on the boat before bed. I crashed into the sack as midnight and was up the next day at six to start my new holiday job. It took me a week to get over it.
The benefits of working together as a family were numerous. I came to respect my mother and father for their ingenuity, perseverance, skill and diligence. I learned many skills from them and respected them for their achievements.
Later in life I would readily help friends with their work when needed and always refused payment. Even now when people suggest they pay me for some non professional service rendered I reply that no payment in necessary but that a dinner invitation would be a mutually agreeable means to appease their sense of gratitude.
This story stuck in my mind ever since. My father built his first house with his own hands and with the help of a carpenter friend. They spend every evening and every weekend for two years building the house (as well as raising a family, working full time and attending technical college in the evenings) and the did the same for another two years while they built the friend's house. There was no thought of asking each other for payment, simply an unspoken agreement that they would help each other as and when needed and that two people working together are more efficient than two working apart.
Throughout my childhood I bonded with my family through work. We build retaining walls, stripped wall paper, painted boats, chopped wood, stripped paint and renovated our batch (Kiwi slang for "holiday house"). On one memorable weekend I laid concrete all day Saturday, went to a school formal that night, stayed up all night partying, went sailing all day Sunday only to return home exhausted at 10pm Sunday evening to be greeted by my father with the news that I was just in time to help him put a coat of paint on the boat before bed. I crashed into the sack as midnight and was up the next day at six to start my new holiday job. It took me a week to get over it.
The benefits of working together as a family were numerous. I came to respect my mother and father for their ingenuity, perseverance, skill and diligence. I learned many skills from them and respected them for their achievements.
Later in life I would readily help friends with their work when needed and always refused payment. Even now when people suggest they pay me for some non professional service rendered I reply that no payment in necessary but that a dinner invitation would be a mutually agreeable means to appease their sense of gratitude.
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But I think you were overworked that time you told us about, some good family advice as well as work together may have been helpful.
But you and your folks sound great!
katyzzz